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Tuesday, December 4, 2012

35-Years in the Making



My wife and I just celebrated our 35th wedding anniversary on November 26th.  We were both kids when we married…I was 18 and she was an older woman of 19.  As with most marriages, it’s had its ups and downs and as she likes to tell folks, “We’ve been happily married for 30-years”. 
In honor of the woman who has put up with my antics for that long, I took her on a whirlwind cruise to the eastern Caribbean aboard Royal Caribbean International’s “Brilliance of the Seas”, and then surprised her by coordinating the renewal of our wedding vows.  It was an awesome and emotionally moving experience for us both.
I was really surprised at just how nerve wracking I found the whole vow renewal thing to be.  I mean, who would have thought that after 35-years I’d be nearly as nervous as I was the day we said, “I do” the first time?  But I was.
The ceremony was a simple but elegant affair with one of the ship’s officers officiating, beautiful white roses, chocolate covered strawberries instead of cake and a champagne toast.  The only others in attendance were 2 photographers and some guy we referred to as the “wedding lurker”; hanging outside of the closed off area and taking photos through the window on deck.  Before it was over, everyone was crying like they were watching the end of the movie “Phenomenon”…including the wedding lurker.
My uncle always referred to my aunt as his “child bride”; a term of endearment that I always admired.  And so I salute my own child bride with this article.  A woman who has given life to four beautiful daughters.  A woman who has followed me half-way around the world and back while I pursued my military career.  A woman who, when we were broke, was willing to work two jobs and take care of 6-kids (a couple of rentals in there) to make sure we had a van to haul everyone around and a roof over our head at night.   
There’s an attitude among a few liberal career women and chauvinistic men in our country that anyone who chooses to make homemaking as their career is less of a success in our world.  Hillary Clinton once touted her working woman career status and famously snapped back at reporters that she could have just “stayed home and baked cookies and had teas”.  More recently, the feministic hatred of homemakers was even felt by Mitt Romney’s wife, Ann, during the recent Presidential election when another Hilary (Rosen) attacked her by saying, “You know what, she’s never actually worked a day in her life”.  
Balderdash!  My wife has worked hard her whole life and taken care of things most people would cringe at doing.  Not only that, she is intelligent and thought-provoking, organized and driven in her “chosen” profession.  Her standards are high, expecting nothing but the best out of herself.  She is tenacious when necessary while possessing social grace when appropriate.  Bottom-line….she is a strong woman tempered by experience and by any measure a complete SUCCESS! 
I feel fortunate to call this woman my wife.  She deserves honor and respect for all she has endured and the lives she has enriched.  I’m proud to have her arm in mine and her gift of a ring on my finger. 
A young couple on the cruise noticed our formal attire and flowers and the young lady asked a question I’ve heard many times, “What’s the secret to a long and happy marriage?”  For me the answer is simple.  Finding a good woman who you love and adore and who reciprocates that love….and then, not screwing it up by being stupid.  That last part is sometimes the hardest.
Papa Chief